wrapping up on ogle street

I have to go over to the old house tonight and steam clean carpets and do the final touch ups. I have no idea when I am getting out of there.

I spent Wednesday over there in the yard. The place has a manual push mower, but the blades are unbelievably dull... so I ended up cutting all of the grass with a weed eater. I also edged the grass, trimmed the hedges, pulled weeds, trimmed back foliage, raked and swept. Managed to get it all done before dark, but am pretty sore today. It's holding a vibrating weed eater a 1/4 inch above the ground for an hour.

So hopefully tonight marks the last of the cleanup there. We have the walkthrough at 11am tomorrow. Hoping to get my deposit back right there, so let's keep our fingers crossed.

I have a show on Sunday at the Tritone, last minute thing. I really don't like that venue. Noisy, weird stage and oddly dark. We'll see how it goes. I think I might have some people from work coming to check it out.

Heading to San Diego next week for a trade show. I better get some great clients out of it.

The Scent of Darkness

The room fills with laughter and echoes the sound of a thousand lost secrets; twisted by the scent of darkness. Blood coils on the outskirts of an otherwise naked horizon, formerly known as my mind.

I have come to this place seeking solitude. I have found my temple of void. A perfect space, for a perfect nothing; wearing a disguise of emotion. Time shares his winter like wind… A professor of madness. A host to the ageless universe.

I sit at the table of isolation sorting through the treasures of memory; reflecting in my eyes like nostalgia. Timeless yesterday, locked inside forever a changing ghost; voiceless and vague.

Around her neck she wears the key to herself.
Around my neck I wear the key to the universe.

The foundation slips, a bitter tongue lashing the words that feed me my illusion. Walls rise like a million masks; their mockery programs the faces… Faces with voices that cannot see... Slightly through the curtains, dressing the windows. The shades drop.

I have come to this place seeking solitude, an eruption, a violent dream... I shed the skin of a young boy. Her blood is the color of December. Her face like a million crushed eyes. She sings a lullaby to her father, disintegrating. Flesh... a mound like a broken vision... cut and stabbed, raped and abandoned; left to live the dream alone. She sings a lullaby to herself.

Dying flame, I am only broken. Nowhere do I longer spin, to hear the voice again that you once whispered. No longer does it wheel inside my head; for the presence lives even longer to die for myself. Only I kill myself, the charms for one invoked bleed inside.

Inside the life I feel.
Inside the life I feel inside and never whisper for you.

By the sound of some voice... Watch out for the nightmare. Who am I running to? Where am I running from? Where should I begin? Whose imagination am I in? A reality, which staggers more than love and a will stronger. If I could put your eyes to words I would capture your soul. Do the dead grieve the living? Nearer to you, something like a respiring orgasm. Dreams of the living haunted by the dead... Illustrate reality... Closer to your breath... panic like rapture.

Unlike the illusion beyond eyes. Drifting worlds; open embrace; the meaning of memory. That which holds me to you like an unforgiving star. I am liquid in eyes untainted by the spell of perfect dreams. I am darkness in the living... Haunted and shadowed. Someone’s eyes have killed me.

I am a reaching corpse –
Fed the universe and the eyes of a thousand darkened wishes. Someone sings, someone chokes on the innards of time. Someone drifts into times rage and feeds on the anger of humanity. When I feel like fucking time... I kill myself... a little everyday.

Time is a terrible lover; the flavor of pain. When the picture in my head hurts more than the blade in my belly. The gift of agony. I am the knife called hope... Illusion and the world. I am the knife called the hope... Twisted dreams and a dying fantasy. I am illusion.

Fingers rip open the mind, touching eyes; somewhere lost in the world is a piece of frozen time… Brutalized by a dagger called faith. What do I have to do? Voices... pay attention. When I listen I fall asleep.

I scribble endlessly... unending... Who stalks his own life and remembers only the voices? Getting to know the faces, brutalized by a dagger called faith. All you have to do is die...

It sleeps an hour more. I watch it from inside. I draw a face that laughs and hang it from my head... And dream with it... I dream with a dagger called faith. A dream from a frozen flame... Another shaky whisper. Getting to know the faces; the faces that dream inside my head... Somewhere lost in the world… I leave my soul behind.

A little place called home

So I just went over to the new place and it is looking better. The sealant has dried, so I can actually walk on the floors again. I took Bern with me to look at the place. She was in awe of how close it is to work and the decent size for what I am paying.

I emailed the property manager this morning, and he profusely apologized for the state that I found it in this weekend. He offered to credit back some of the prorated rent and also credit any money that I spent in thinking I was going to move over the weekend. Luckily, I hadn't spent any money directly related to moving last weekend (like renting a truck, which I need to do for next weekend), so we don't need to worry about that.

I am in the middle of training a new sales rep today, and it looks like I might be able to get most of it handled today and not have too much carry over into tomorrow. He seems quick to learn, and I am really excited about having him on board.

Going to go and dig up the window AC units from the basement this evening and get them in the windows. Then it will be more packing, packing, packing.

He is risen; I am knackered

Here I am at the end of a long weekend. We had off on Friday from work for Good Friday, which was a nice little perk. Friday I went into the city and took a look at my new place. Dave from the property management company said that the crew would be all done on Thursday, and the cleaning lady was supposedly going to be out of there by early Friday morning. This was not the case.

When I went over Friday afternoon, there were still remnants of the construction all over the place. Paint cans on the kitchen counter and in the coat closet. No doors on the bedroom closet. No shelves in the pantry. Paint splatters on the kitchen linoleum. The patch job they did on the kitchen floor left a bit to be desired.

Leah came over, looked at the place and we went up to University City to look at a bedroom set. In whole, it was too much for the place. A matching bed, dresser, bookcase, bureau and desk. I talked to the girl, and she is going to sell me the bed, dresser and bookcase. I am excited to get them.

That night I went out with Jon, Diane and George (one of Diane's friends from the Northwester Alumni Assoc) who now lives in Brooklyn. We went out to Devil's Alley for dinner and then I took them to look at the new place. What do I discover? In the four hours since I'd been there... they managed to come in and put sealant on the floors.

Anyone who knows about sealant knows that they've made the place uninhabitable until it dries. But wait... they weren't done. Saturday (my move in day), another coat. I go back this morning, another coat. Grrrr. I need to call the property manager in the morning.

I went to Patti and Peter's today for brunch. Very nice time. We all sat out on their front porch for hours, just talking about random stuff and swapping stories.

Came home and worked in the yard for a little bit. Now just waiting for laundry to finish before I go to bed. It needs to hurry up... so tired.

He lives!

Well it’s been quite some time since I last posted on here. There is so much that has happened; I don’t even know where to begin. Let me try to recap this quickly in a single post, and than can get into the details of different things later…

- A little over a month ago Leah and I split up. It was as amicable a split as we could have, and we are trying to keep the friendship. I think things are going to work out well for us with what we’ve learned and are continuing to learn from each other. I am still in the house in Manayunk, but only for another week or so, as I am moving into the city.

- After quite a search and some interesting encounters, I found a place that I really like. It’s on 15th & Pine… great location. I was approved yesterday and will be signing the lease sometime next week. I will post more about the place later.

- I have been taking PHIT’s Level Two class, which actually concludes this Sunday. It’s a great group of people, and have had fun learning from Bobbi. A full recap of the class will be posted later.

- HellBaby is progressing well. Alison left the group last week citing scheduling difficulties. We are anxious for Kelly to get back from doing her play in Florida. She’s missed a lot, and we want to spin her up quickly. So much going on here, I can’t even begin to touch it.

- Lots of discussions in the Ninjas and really trying to find a good path of growth for the group. We are applying for the Del Close Marathon in NYC this summer.

- Work has been very busy. Went to Atlanta for a trade show a few weeks back, and that went very well. There will be a lot of traveling and shows coming up soon.

So I am going to wrap for now, there’s the super short list. There is so much more, and maybe I’ll get to it all… we’ll see, won’t we?